Easy Bread

A mower was mowing in the meadow. He got tired and sat down under a bush to rest. He took out a small bag, untied it, and started chewing on some bread.

A hungry wolf came out of the forest. He saw the mower sitting under the bush and eating something. The wolf approached him and asked:

- What are you eating, man?

- Bread, replied the mower.

- Is it tasty?

- Oh, it’s very tasty!

- Let me have a taste.

- Sure, go ahead.

The mower broke off a piece of bread and gave it to the wolf.

The wolf liked the bread. He said:

- I wish I could eat bread every day, but where can I get it? Tell me, man!

- Alright, said the mower, I’ll teach you where and how to get bread.

And he began to instruct the wolf:

- First, you need to plow the land...

- And then I’ll have bread?

- No, brother, wait. Then you need to harrow the land...

- And then I can eat bread? The wolf wagged his tail.

- Not yet, hold on. First, you need to sow rye...

- And then I’ll have bread? The wolf licked his lips.

- Not yet. Wait for the rye to sprout, survive the cold winter, grow in the spring, bloom, form ears, and ripen...

- Oh, sighed the wolf, that’s a long wait! But then I’ll eat as much bread as I want!

- You won’t get to eat just yet! interrupted the mower. First, you need to harvest the ripe rye, tie it into sheaves, stack the sheaves into piles. The wind will dry them, the sun will bake them, then you take them to the threshing floor...

- And then I’ll eat bread?

- Oh, how impatient! First, you need to thresh the sheaves, pour the grain into sacks, take the sacks to the mill, and grind the flour...

- And that’s it?

- No, not yet. You need to knead the flour into dough and wait for it to rise. Then you bake it in a hot oven.

- And the bread will be ready?

- Yes, the bread will be ready. Only then will you get to eat it, finished the mower.

The wolf thought for a moment, scratched the back of his head, and said:

- No! This work is too long and hard. Better tell me, man, how to get food the easier way.

- Well then, said the mower, if you don’t want hard-earned bread, go eat something light. Go to the pasture, there’s a horse grazing there.

The wolf went to the pasture. He saw the horse.

- Horse, horse! I’m going to eat you.

- Alright, said the horse, eat me. But first, take the horseshoes off my feet so you don’t break your teeth on them.

- That’s true, agreed the wolf. He bent down to remove the horseshoes, and the horse kicked him in the teeth with its hoof... The wolf tumbled over and ran away.

He ran to the river. He saw geese grazing on the shore. “Maybe I should eat them?” he thought. Then he said:

- Geese, geese! I’m going to eat you.

- Alright, replied the geese, eat us. But first, do us one favor before we die.

- What is it?

- Sing for us, and we’ll listen.

- I can do that. I’m good at singing.

The wolf sat on a hummock, lifted his head, and started howling. The geese flapped their wings—flap, flap—and flew away.

The wolf got down from the hummock, watched the geese fly away, and walked off with nothing.

As he walked, he cursed himself: “What a fool I am! Why did I agree to sing? Well, now, whoever I meet—I’ll eat them!”

Just as he thought this, he saw an old man walking along the road. The wolf ran up to him:

- Old man, old man, I’m going to eat you!

- Why the rush? said the old man. Let’s have a sniff of tobacco first.

- Is it tasty?

- Try it and see.

- Alright.

The old man took a tobacco pouch from his pocket, took a sniff himself, and gave it to the wolf. The wolf inhaled deeply and sucked in the entire pouch of tobacco. Then he started sneezing so loudly it echoed through the forest... He couldn’t see anything through his tears, just kept sneezing. He sneezed for an hour until all the tobacco was out. When he finally looked around, the old man was gone.

The wolf walked on. He walked and walked, and saw a flock of sheep grazing in a field, with the shepherd asleep. The wolf spotted the best ram in the flock, grabbed it, and said:

- Ram, ram, I’m going to eat you!

- Alright, said the ram, such is my fate. But to save you the trouble and to keep you from breaking your teeth on my old bones, stand in that hollow over there, open your mouth, and I’ll run up the hill, gain speed, and fly right into your mouth.

- Thanks for the advice, said the wolf. Let’s do that.

He stood in the hollow, opened his mouth, and waited. The ram ran up the hill, gained speed, and rammed the wolf’s head with its horns. Sparks flew from the wolf’s eyes, and everything spun around him!

The wolf came to his senses, shook his head, and muttered to himself:

- Did I eat him or not?

Meanwhile, the mower finished his work and was heading home. He overheard the wolf’s words and said:

- You didn’t eat him, but you sure tasted some easy bread.

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Easy Bread

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