The Lord of Lords

A girl was hired as a servant by an eccentric elderly gentleman. He asks her:
- What will you call me?
- Master, or sir, or whatever you prefer, sir, - the girl replies.
- You must call me "Lord of Lords." And what will you call this? - he asks, pointing to his bed.
- A bed, or a cot, or whatever you prefer, sir.
- You must call it a "resting place." And this? - the gentleman asks, pointing to his trousers.
- Pants, or trousers, or whatever you prefer, sir.
- You must call them "fancy-fanfare." And this? - he asks, pointing to the cat.
- A cat, or kitty, or whatever you prefer, sir.
- You must call her "Felicia the Fair-Faced." And what will you call this? - he asks, pointing to water.
- Water, or liquid, or whatever you prefer, sir.
- You must call it "wet mundia."
And this? - he points to the fire.
- Fire, or flame, or whatever you prefer, sir.
- You must call it "the red roosterius." And this? - he points to his house.
- A house, or a mansion, or whatever you prefer, sir.
- You must call it "the celestial colossus."

That same night, the master is awakened by the servant's terrified cry:
- Lord of Lords! Get off your resting place and put on your fancy-fanfare! Felicia the Fair-Faced knocked over a candle, so if you don’t run for the wet mundia right now, the red roosterius will burn down your entire celestial colossus!

More fairy tales

• A Profitable Deal
• Little Mattie and the King
• Three Clever Heads
• The Silver Whistle of the MacCrimmons
• Mr. Vinegar