How the Animals Celebrated Maslenitsa

Many years ago, on the eve of Maslenitsa, people gathered in the evening to sit and chat. They talked about the delicious treats they had prepared for the upcoming holiday.

"We have," boasted some, "a fattened ram; we'll slaughter it." Others said:

"We'll eat our gander." Someone remarked:

"We have a rooster; we'll feast on him." And some poor folks said:

"What about us? We have nothing; we'll eat our cat—he's very fat."

The cat was lying nearby, pretending to sleep. He had heard the whole conversation.

"Not a chance!" he thought. "I'll run away!" He slipped through a hole and went to the gander.

"What are you doing?" he asked the gander. "Are you sleeping or what?"

"I can't even tell what I'm doing," replied the gander. "Am I sleeping or not? I'm here with my geese."

"If only you knew what I know," said the cat, "you wouldn't be sleeping: they've decided to eat you for Maslenitsa."

"Is that so?" said the gander. "In that case, I'll run away. Wait a minute, I'll put on my clogs, and we'll be on our way."

They immediately went to the rooster.

"What are you doing?" they asked the rooster. "Are you sleeping or what?"

"I can't even tell what I'm doing," replied the rooster. "Am I sleeping or not? I'm here with my hens."

"Leave this place if you want to stay alive," they said. "They've decided to eat you for Maslenitsa."

"Oh! In that case, I'm leaving. Wait, I'll put on my shoes and go with you."

They went to fetch the ram.

"What are you doing, ram?" they asked him. "Are you sleeping or what?"

"Ah, I can't even tell what I'm doing," replied the ram. "I'm lying in the manure with my sheep."

"Come with us if you want to stay alive," they told him. "If you stay here, they'll eat you for Maslenitsa."

"In that case," said the ram, "let's go! I'll pull on my boots and join you."

And so, the four of them set off. They walked, rested, and walked again.

Along the way, their stomachs growled from hunger: they found nothing to eat. The ram found some grass in the roadside ditches and nibbled on it; the rooster and the gander also made do with grass—better than nothing—but the poor cat got nothing at all.

"Listen," the other animals said to the cat, "you're good at climbing trees; climb up that oak and see if you can spot any light."

The cat climbed the tree and said:

"I see a light, but it's far, very far away!"

They walked on and reached the house from which the light was coming. The house was brightly lit, and from inside came singing, laughter, and wild noise. It was clear they were celebrating Maslenitsa.

The cat poked his head under the door and peeked inside. He saw a lion, a wolf, a fox, and a bear frying meat in a pan.

"Oh," said the cat, "we're out of luck. I see a lion, a wolf, a fox, and a bear celebrating Maslenitsa."

All four big animals were tipsy: they amused each other with stories and boasted loudly. The bear said:

"Here we are, the four strongest animals in the world!"

The lion added:

"Even if the devil himself came here, we'd eat him!" The cat said to his companions:

"If we go in there, they'll eat us all; let's try to scare them. Hide, and I'll climb onto the roof and go down the chimney. I'll hiss as loud as I can. Maybe they'll get scared and run away; then we can eat, or we'll starve."

He climbed onto the roof—clomp, clomp, clomp—and descended the chimney, cursing and covering the hearth with soot.

"Quiet!" said the bear. "Who's coming?" The four strongest animals in the world were seriously frightened.

"It must be people; we're in trouble!" said the lion.

"You fool, you said even the devil couldn't scare us!"

"Here he comes," said the wolf. "Let's run!" They flung open the door and fled.

Meanwhile, the cat managed to grab a piece of meat and called to the others:

"They're gone! Come in quickly!"

The animals rushed into the house. The lion, wolf, fox, and bear had prepared a feast. They had just started on the salad when they were interrupted.

Each of the animals took what they liked. The gander perched on the hearth and devoured the salad, the cat settled by the meat, the ram found some hay, and the rooster pecked at the bread.

When they were finally full, the cat said:

"That's not all: we need to hide. Those animals won't let us feast for long. They'll come back to see who scared them; we can't let them find us here."

No sooner said than done. The cat buried himself in a pile of ashes, the gander hid by the hearth, the ram climbed into the woodbox, and the rooster perched on the stove.

Suddenly, the four small animals heard the big ones approaching the house, pushing each other and saying:

"You go in first! You go in first!"

But none of them dared to enter. Finally, they managed to push the wolf forward.

"You're not a coward; go to the hearth and light the fire. We'll see who scared us."

The wolf entered with small steps, trembling with fear. Seeing him approach, the cat bared his teeth and extended his claws. When the wolf came close to the hearth, the cat lunged at his face, scratching it with his sharp claws. The wolf bolted out of the house.

"Ah, you villains!" he cried. "You've really done a number on me! Do you know who scared us? A wool carder. I found him there. He hit me twice with his carding comb, first on the right, then on the left."

Then the animals said to the bear:

"You're good with a club; you have nothing to fear. Go! Approach the woodbox. Take a log: search the house and teach those inside a lesson."

The bear went. Seeing him approach, the ram prepared himself, and when the bear came close, the ram charged, knocked him to the ground, and broke two of his ribs.

The bear barely managed to crawl out of the house.

"Villains!" he said to the others. "You really did a number on me. A woodcutter was hiding in the woodbox; he hit me so hard with his stick that he broke four, if not five, of my ribs."

After that, the animals said to the fox:

"You're very nimble; sneak in quietly and take the jug of wine by the hearth; at least we'll have a drink to lift our spirits."

The fox cautiously crept into the house.

As soon as she approached the hearth, the gander started hissing—sss-sss-sss... The fox dashed back outside.

"Ah, my friends!" she said. "I'm back! Lucky I'm so quick! There's a hunter in the house; he'd probably set a pack of dogs on me."

Then the three animals turned to the lion:

"Hey, you lazybones, you haven't done anything yet! At least go close the door!"

The lion reluctantly approached the door. The rooster, perched on the stove and having left a pile of droppings, dropped it on the lion's head. The lion immediately backed away.

"Ah, devils," he said, "you really did a number on me! I'm all messed up! A doctor must have gotten into the house; he threw a plaster on my head, and it really stinks!"

Faced with such resistance, the four big animals left. And so, the four small animals drove away the four big ones.

And that's the end.

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How the Animals Celebrated Maslenitsa

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