The Farmer and His Master
Once upon a time, a farmer named Gaspard decided to repay his debt to his master. He went to his master's house and asked the maid:"Is the master at home?"
"Where else would he be? He's having breakfast with his friends."
"Then tell him I've brought the money I borrowed."
The maid ran off and immediately informed the master:
"Gaspard is here; he's brought the money."
"Very good! Bring him to me," the master said with a smile, and turning to his friends, he added, "This is one of my debtors, a real fool. You'll see what a fine joke I'll play on him. He won't notice a thing, but we'll have a good laugh."
The maid led Gaspard into the room.
"Good day, master."
"Hello, Gaspard, hello."
"Here's the money I owe you."
"Well done, Gaspard! Sit down over there by the fireplace. Rest, you must be tired from the road."
Gaspard perched on the edge of the bench and stared wide-eyed at the master and his guests. The master winked at his friends and asked Gaspard:
"So, what's new on the farm?"
"Well, master, something strange happened! Our cow gave birth to five calves."
"Five calves?!" the master exclaimed in surprise. "That can't be. What does the fifth calf do while the other four are suckling milk?"
"What does it do? The same thing I'm doing now: looking around."
"Hmm..." the master muttered, catching the hint. "Hey, Susanna, bring Gaspard a plate!"
The maid brought Gaspard a plate, and he sat down at the table. A large platter of fried fish was placed in front of the master.
He put two small, skinny fish on Gaspard's plate. The farmer picked them up by their tails, held them to his ear, listened, shook his head, and then tossed them back onto the plate.
"Are you trying to say they're not very fresh?" the master asked, winking at his guests.
"That's not it, master," the peasant said, scratching his ear. "A year ago, my uncle drowned in the river. So I asked the fish how he's doing down there. But they didn't comfort me; they said they didn't know anything about my uncle because they were born after that sad event... I think I'll take that big carp over there instead. Maybe it can give me an answer..."
"What a character! Fine, take it if you must..."
After the fish, a roasted ham was brought in.
"Gaspard, would you like some ham?"
"With great pleasure..."
"Then help yourself," the master offered, handing the peasant a tiny piece.
Gaspard swallowed the piece and grunted approvingly: "Fine ham!"
He pulled a folding knife from his pocket, cut a good-sized piece from the ham, ate it, and then reached for more...
"Listen, Gaspard, it's not my place to interrupt your meal, but keep in mind: those who eat too much ham lose the ability to speak. Ever heard of that?"
"Thank you for telling me, master, because my old woman is terribly talkative... With your permission, I'll take the rest of the ham and make her eat it all. Maybe then she'll stop nagging me."
Gaspard took the ham and bowed out, while the master decided to escort him to the door, just in case.
As soon as they left the room, the friends clutched their sides and burst into laughter. Now, figure out for yourselves who they were laughing at. In any case, it wasn't Gaspard!
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